GET TO THE FUCKING POINT.
Never mind the boring, droning, pedantic talking heads who avoid writing themselves a script or interject false information they were either too lazy to get right or too stubborn to be bothered with facts. The biggest problem is their ability to take 30 seconds of useful information and wrap it in 10 minutes of garbage exposition, rattling off 8 examples to make a point when 2-3 will do and 0 would be even better. Most seemingly do it because they refuse to write an outline and stick to it or they’re trying to impress you with fluff trivia to distract you from their lack of charisma, creativity or actual insight. That shit works in text because a reader can easily skim over it, unlike a YouTube video.
So, you’re not buying the Canon EOS R, Nikon Z7 or Fujifilm X-T3? Well good for you, big fucking whoop. Why not explain it in a way that doesn’t sound like a 2 year old who doesn’t want to eat dinner? When you’re not nearly as influential as you imagine yourself to be, you need to get to the point, especially after luring in viewers with your clickbait title and 15 seconds of shilling right at the top. No, your 30,000 subscribers is not impressive… it’s less than a statistical error in the Nielsen ratings for a canceled series on basic cable. It only gets worse once you deduct the bots and spam accounts in your subscriber rolls.
Now don’t even get me started on the narcissistic twats who have a 10+ second sting before they start their shilling. Add that to the 20+ seconds used up to say, “thank you to (insert product here) for making my vlog diary profitable! (inserted product) does (insert action here) great for assholes like you, by (insert minimum of 5 examples here) and you can enjoy a 10% token discount we give to everyone by going to (insert website here) and using coupon code: IMADOOSH. Thank you again to (insert product name) for helping fund my long-winded video,” and if you’re anything like me, you are looking for ways to sue them to get your click back. This is truly where “fake it ’til you make it” has gone horribly wrong. Production values and an intro you haven’t earned do nothing to disguise poor content or lack of credibility; in fact it only makes it worse.
If you want to improve your viewership, build your credibility, don’t be a shill, display some humility, get a creative producer, leave your well-lit den, write a script, don’t use onscreen text to correct yourself, and don’t go on for 10 minutes if you can make your point in 2.
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